Several weeks ago I posted a writing I received from God in which He strongly suggested that I excise the nasty habits I have of self-judgment and self-loathing. Only in the vaguest sense have I reported my progress in this effort. I have mentioned that I had been working personal processes that my housemates had been supporting in.
I now wish to give a progress report. In actuality I had excised these habits just prior to our visit to the Sequoia National Forest. As is typical with me it involved a two part emotional process which took place over a week's time.
The first part is always the most difficult which is getting "in touch" with the feelings. The deeper the issue the more difficult this is to do. I can say that this issue was at the deepest core of my very being. I have never worked a deeper issue and it was highly emotional.
I got in touch with the very source of my self-judgment and self-loathing. It was not that I didn't love myself. It wasn't because I thought I was unlovable. It was because I hated myself.
Now, I know that is a shocking statement and many of you will want to immediately refute it. But I can tell you that it took a great deal of effort to get to that feeling. The good news is once you get in touch with something, then you can process it and heal it.
It is a peculiarity of mine that once I get in touch with such feelings I like to "be" with it for a while before I further process it. I figure it has taken me a lot of effort and energy to get in touch with whatever I'm processing. Once I have done so, I like to figure out how it has served me and my life. Once I understand I am then willing to release it.
Due to circumstances I did not have the luxury of spending as much time with these feelings as I would have liked. Two days later in the second part of the process I emotionally released the self-hatred which often manifested itself as self-judgment and self-loathing.
As is also typical with me, I have written a narrative of my process but have yet to decide if I will post it here. I do think that others might gain insight to their own lives by sharing it but it is deeply personal and I haven't decided to share it yet.
I am posting this limited report on my progress. I can tell you that these nasty habits have been excised as God had suggested. I really do follow His guidance in nearly all aspects of my life. The habits are simply gone and have been replaced with self-love which continues to manifest itself in interesting ways.
My choice to get off sugar is one of ways. Another is how I presently criticize myself. When I observe something I haven't accomplished, a fault, or even a mistake, I really don't judge myself about it. I observe it, and see the opportunity for improvement. There is no judgment, just opportunity.
So with love and affection and maybe even a little pride, I can say: The Journey continues.
I now wish to give a progress report. In actuality I had excised these habits just prior to our visit to the Sequoia National Forest. As is typical with me it involved a two part emotional process which took place over a week's time.
The first part is always the most difficult which is getting "in touch" with the feelings. The deeper the issue the more difficult this is to do. I can say that this issue was at the deepest core of my very being. I have never worked a deeper issue and it was highly emotional.
I got in touch with the very source of my self-judgment and self-loathing. It was not that I didn't love myself. It wasn't because I thought I was unlovable. It was because I hated myself.
Now, I know that is a shocking statement and many of you will want to immediately refute it. But I can tell you that it took a great deal of effort to get to that feeling. The good news is once you get in touch with something, then you can process it and heal it.
It is a peculiarity of mine that once I get in touch with such feelings I like to "be" with it for a while before I further process it. I figure it has taken me a lot of effort and energy to get in touch with whatever I'm processing. Once I have done so, I like to figure out how it has served me and my life. Once I understand I am then willing to release it.
Due to circumstances I did not have the luxury of spending as much time with these feelings as I would have liked. Two days later in the second part of the process I emotionally released the self-hatred which often manifested itself as self-judgment and self-loathing.
As is also typical with me, I have written a narrative of my process but have yet to decide if I will post it here. I do think that others might gain insight to their own lives by sharing it but it is deeply personal and I haven't decided to share it yet.
I am posting this limited report on my progress. I can tell you that these nasty habits have been excised as God had suggested. I really do follow His guidance in nearly all aspects of my life. The habits are simply gone and have been replaced with self-love which continues to manifest itself in interesting ways.
My choice to get off sugar is one of ways. Another is how I presently criticize myself. When I observe something I haven't accomplished, a fault, or even a mistake, I really don't judge myself about it. I observe it, and see the opportunity for improvement. There is no judgment, just opportunity.
So with love and affection and maybe even a little pride, I can say: The Journey continues.
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