I have posted this for Broolyn who is crazy about burros,
or as we call them Pablo's -- even if their names are Noah & Murphy.

Not easy

Many of you know that I seem to have a way with the ladies. I have more lady friends than I do men friends. I just seem to be able to charm them and can have them eating out of my hand. Not in this case. This little lady wouldn't warm up to be at first. And I must admit that I resorted to literally having her eat out of my hand. Even with a treat in hand, she still did not immediately warm up to me. She's and older dog, and like many older ladies, she is set in her ways. She has warmed up to enough to take a treat from me. And as I never known when I'm going to see her, I've come to keeping dog treats in my coat pocket. Oh, and her name is Peaches. I'm going to tell the guys back at the plant to control themselves. This one is way too easy and it's beneath you to leave another smartass comment.

Writing Again

On warm days, I go to the upper pasture to write. My landlords are very generous people. About where you see the log in lower left of this picture now sits a table which they moved up from the barn. I set my chair at the table and as they have also set off this portion of the pasture for regrowth I don't have to worry about the burros messing with it. In a month or so, I'll choose a new location.

While I am happy to report that I'm writing again I must say that it has become a balancing act. I am still typing on the 2009 writings and I found 3/4 of a notebook of 2007 that needs typed as well. I write for several hours, then that needs typed up, and then I usually have to research my past writings to add to the writing. I edit the complete text and then use that to once again to write. Progress is being made, but it is slow.

I have writings that I have held with God since 2004. I wrote to the angels for two years before that. Most of these writings were done in small hand held journals. Sometime in 2007 I graduated to using spiral notebooks. Two pages of handwritten text ends up being one page of typed text. In 2004 there were 32 pages. In April of 2005, my writings became dialogues with God -- I have 241 pages from that year. In 2006 there were 380 pages. In 2007 I only wrote through October and while I have more to type there are 274 pages. I did not start to write again until June of 2008 and I have 219 pages. Each writing is filed by the date I received it unless I received the writing over several days. There was a writing in August of 2008 that went on for five days and ended up being 27 pages typed. I share these statistics with you, so you might understand what it entails when I say I have to research my past writings. I soon post an article about my writings and how I have to see myself as God's Messenger.

I Am

From time to time, I am going to offer some explanation as to how I came to follow this path. It has taken great courage to follow this Journey of the Heart. This journey is an expansion of my relationship with God. It has taken great faith to come to Oregon to write a book with God. It has also taken knowing who I am.

I am a Messenger of God.
I am a Prophet.
I am a Spiritual Leader.

Some find that affirmation upsetting. They don't understand how I can say that. In fact they find it pretty gutsy. I would tend to agree with that assessment. These are not statements of my doingness but statements of my beingness. Conversations with God tells us that "the words 'I am' are extremely powerful. They are statements to the universe. Commands."

In last August of last year I held a lengthy dicussion with God about coming to Oregon to write this book. During that discussion I experienced a transformation. A powerful, dramatic, emotional transformation. This book stopped being part of my doingness and became part of my very being. It was here that the words "I am" were affirmed. It was in those moments that I absolutely knew that I was retiring and moving to Oregon. And now I'm here. Writing.

Today, I'm posting an explanation of how I can say: I am a Prophet on the From The Barn pages. Once again I encourage your comments and questions.

http://journeychapters.blogspot.com/2009/03/i-am-prophet.html

Extraordianry

I have an aunt who checks this blog on a regular basis. She carefully read the writing I posted on From The Barn. In that writing God tells me that I need to type all of my writings that I have not entered into my computer. This is no small task and God indicated that it would take diligence. My dear aunt has a way -- has always had a way - of making sure I am doing what I am suppose to be doing. In this case, she is making sure I do so with all due diligence. I am happy to report that I am making great progress and am currently typing writings from December of 2008.

I am afraid that I take this skill for granted far too often. I sometimes forget just how extraordinary it is to have this ability to talk with God. Today I was typing a writing that I found to be extraordinary for the reason of what God wasn't telling as much as for what He was. I share an excerpt of it on From The Barn. And in advance, I will apologize for the over use of the word extraordinary.

I'm also posting a photo of me diligently typing away. And trust me, my aunt won't see it as proof that I am indeed doing so anymore than you do. lol.

http://journeychapters.blogspot.com/2009/03/extraordinary.html

First Day of Spring

On the first day of spring I planted these flowers in the planter just outside my door. I did so for the color but also I am missing the Primrose Poker folks. I miss you guys! Okay, so I miss playing poker but will think of you guys every time I stop to look at these primroses.

Recycling

I have become much more of a environmentalist than when I lived in the Midwest. I have become more conscious of my impact upon the earth. I have begun to recycle. It is much easier to do so on this side of the country.

I recently bought three 4G flash drives at Costco for $35. That was good price. A very good price. When I got home I unwrapped them and that's when it struck me. The packaging. The flash drives were wrapped in 8.5 x 11 inch plastic. It served no purpose other than to keep the drives from ripped off. Two minutes. That was it's usefulness. I had to put it the trash as it was not recyclable.

I have a cousin who teaches about building green. She's quite the environmentalist. She sent me this link about The Story of Stuff. It was both entertaining and educational. It hasn't turned me into a strap-myself-around-a-tree-in-front-of-the-bulldozers kind of environmentalist. It has caused me to be more conscious of my choices. I try to think twice when I go out to get more stuff. I hope you'll watch the story and join me in thinking twice about why you're buying more stuff. Better yet, I hope you'll send the link to other people, so they too can know The Story of Stuff.

http://www.storyofstuff.com/

Inside the Barn

Barn Interior

Many of you have been very curious about where I live. I finished unpacked and that completes Item #4 on The List. I didn't want to list all of the photos here on my blog and hoped to find a smoother way to share all this photos. The best I can come up with is a web album on Picasa. Clicking on the above photo will take you to an album entitled Barn Interior. Just click on 4 Slideshow to see photos of my home. Just use the ESC button on your keyboard to leave the slideshow. You may need to click several times on the Back button to return to this screen.

I learned

Late last night I learned that the company that I retired from filed for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy on Tuesday. My pension is funded separately, and so, I believe it to be safe. For now, the powers-that-be say that it will be business as usual and that this move enables the corporation to have financial restructuring options i In today's economy, what once was secure can so quickly become quite the opposite. My thoughts and prayers are with my co-workers, my friends, that I left behind.

Amazing!

Or perhaps not so amazing. Perhaps just more of the synchronicity of walking my path.

As promised in my earlier post, I have been typing my writings. In August of last year I went through a spiritual transformation through my conversations with God. I have posted on this blog about that transformation.* As you know I am typing as part of an assignment from God because I got a bit overwhelmed with this book writing process. Today's typing was a writing Saturday, August 30, 2008. Some six days after the transformation and some six months prior to moving here.

What I find a amazing is the subject matter. We discussed my upcoming move to Oregon and amazingly enough -- my book writing process. Many of my present concerns were addressed in that writing. Including percentages of receiving new material, excerpts from past writings and both quotes from and paraphrasing of Conversations With God material. I was surprised to read that we had discussed including teachings/comments/quotes of my own.

What I find equally amazing is the synchronicity of finding and reading this writing now even as I am typing it as exercise in focusing my book process. Amazing!

* That writing was 27 typed pages. Today's was 13 pages. I have thought to share them on this blog but it requires a lot of work to do so. If there is real interest in reading them left on the comments page or sent to my private email, I will do the work and post them.

Weekend Travels

Am back from my long weekend of travels. As I drove south along I-5 to visit freinds and family in California, I had this great view of Mount Shasta. The background of this collage is the northern view as I drove south. The other three photos are the southern view as I returned home to The Barn. While I did have a relaxing weekend, I also did work on typing writings -- Item #5 on The List. There is still a lot of typing to do and I will be working on it as soon as this is posted.

Remember that you can click on the pic to enlarge it.

The List

If you took the time to read the writing From The Barn, then you know I have been given a list to accomplish. I have completed 1, 2, 3 and 6. Am working on 4. Have worked to relax as listed in 9. I will report when I have accomplished the others as I do so. Of course, for the time being, I will be writing with pen and ink instead of typing but I will report on how the transcribing goes.

Now, if you read the writing you may have learned I'm a perfectionist. If you know me personally, you may have already known this. Additionally in the writing, you learned that I set very high expectations on myself -- unrealistic expectations. As you learned, I felt I was struggling and on the verge of failure. For lots of different reasons. As I printed out the edited copy I realized that I had 44 pages! If I add the pages from Struggling, it's over 50! As of today I have been here two weeks -- and I have 44 pages completed. Realizing that really brought home how unrealistic I was being.

I'm really going to work to relax about this book process. I'll report on my progress on the list.

I'm going back to California to visit with family and friends for the weekend. Will be back on Tuesday. How's that for relaxing? The Journey continues.

Answering the Bigger Question

The following question was added to comments by my friend Dano: If God was touched to his soul, that would suppose that God had a soul, hence there could be someone greater than God that gave him a soul. But, isn't God at the top of the food chain?

I love this question! For several reasons. It is the question of a thinking man. He took what I had received from God and thought about it and came up with this question. It for this reason that I share excerpts and encourage comments. Throughout the entire Conversations With God series, God continually encourages us to think. Throughout my personal conversations God has brought answers to my own questions and has encouraged me to think about what I know, and what I believe and why I believe it. Much of what I have learned through the CWG cosmology. (Some 20+ books.) The first three - Book 1, 2 and 3 contain a huge amount of information of Who God is.

My answer has several parts:

One. God can experience anything God wants to experience. That includes being touched to the soul. That includes having a soul.

Two. There is only One of us. There is only God. We, as individualiaztions of the One Soul, is God experiencing God.

Three. There is a brief mention of God's God in CWG. As in one sentence. I couldn't find it to quote it here. Perhaps someone else who has read it can send me the exact reference. Anyway, the conversation is about the evolution of the soul. In general, as soul's we come to this life to experience in the relative that which we know in the absolute. In this way as souls we are constantly evolving. God tells us that we can eventually evolve to be Gods in other universes.

We know so very little about just how complex the universe is. Or how big it is. I'm oversimplifying but don't you image that we appear to be Gods to an ant? Do we not feel as small when we think of God? Do you think it stops there? Or is it infinite? I have had this discussion with some very advanced spiritual thinkers. They have explained of God as God and One above him/her as The Creator. This all gets very deep for me. I can barely grasp the concept, let alone explain it.

Well that's my quick answer. I encourage everyone to explore the Conversations With God series by Neale Donald Walsch -- especially the first three books. They can be bought very cheaply on Amazon. This is where I have found the answers that satisfy me. I hope that my answer, my journey encourages you to find your own answers.

Struggling

Many people ask me how the writing is going and I usually answer good. When I am writing the communication flows smoothly and as yesterday's excerpt demonstrates I often receive profound messages. The writing is going well.

That is the truth when I am writing. That is not the same with the book writing process. After I receive a writing the book writing process begins. First I type the writing into my computer. As necessary I may need to add an excerpt from a previous writing. Sometimes that's easy to find. Sometimes it's not. The same with finding the appropriate Conversations With God (CWG)quote that applies to the situation God and I are communicating about. After all of that happens, I then edit the writing or chapter (still not sure which it is.) After editing, I print it, edit again and print a final copy. I can have two days work from three hours of writing. Please understand this is not whining but an explanation of my wriitng process as well as an explanation of why I have felt overwhelmed. I have been struggling to make progress. Finally, this morning I decided to talk to God about it.

I read that writing to the dear friend who is mentioned in it. I asked her if I should share the writing here. Her response: "Yes, I think it would both demystify and mystify the process!" What a great answer! I have decided to share the writing in its entirity but it's far too long to post here. I have included a link to it in a sidebar titled From The Barn. Just click on it and off you'll go to the writing. It is a long writing -- some five typed pages. If you wish to read it, be forewarned, you will be scrolling down quite a bit.

Now, if you are reading this I need your help. I need your comments. Particularly about these two excerpts I have posted. You do not have to be agreement with them to be able to comment. I will post any serious comment verbatim. It takes some effort to post an excerpt and so I need to know if it's worth the effort. Do you enjoy them? Do you enjoy the conversation? The format of the writing? This is very critical to me as this is/will be the format of the book. And if it's not enjoyable, then perhaps it's time for me to pack it in and go home.

Making comments is pretty easy. Click on the word comments. Type your text. You don't have to have an account or sign in. It would be very nice if you added your name. Just a first name is fine and you don't need a URL. Just click on the circle beside name. Remember you have to click on plublish comment to post it. You can even just use annonymous but I will tell you know that I will not post an annonymous critical comment. If you know my personal email, it's okay to send your comments that way but I'll really like to encourage people to post their commetns.

Okay that's it. I have my work cut out for me as you'll see if you read the writing.

Thanks again for your support.

An Excerpt

From time to time I will post an excerpt of what I am receiving/writing. We had been discussing that I do not love my father.

My comments are in this color and God's responses are in this color.

What I am left with is a feeling that is more powerful than love.

More powerful than love? There is nothing more powerful than love.

I don’t want to argue with God. Scratch that. I do want to differ with you. There is a feeling, an emotion, greater in power than love. Gratitude.

I’m not talking about the kind of gratitude that causes you to say “thank you.” I’m not talking about the kind of gratitude that makes you grateful for your job, the roof over your head or food upon the table. I’m talking about the kind of gratitude that fills your whole being, that warms your entire being – that warms you down to your very soul. That is the expression that everyone understands, but for me it happens in reverse. I am grateful at a soul level and it fills me, fills my very being with warmth. It is so powerful that it heals. It is a gratitude that I usually reserve for God – for you.

I am humbled by your gratitude, by your love for me. (Soft, quiet reverent voice.) I am warmed by it. As you have described it, I will agree with you – gratitude is more powerful than love. Thank you. Thank you for sharing this with me. With us.

I am not sure it is possible to humble God.

It is if I wish to experience it. As you expressed it, I felt it. I can only say that you touched my soul. Saying that you humbled me expresses the moment perfectly. And you say this is the feeling you hold for your father?

It is beyond love. It is gratitude at soul to soul level. I know you wish to discuss why I have not forgotten if I have forgiven at such a level but I would – with your permission – like to point out something.

Please do. We are nearly finished with this writing and will be moving to what we have previously written. What do you wish to point out?

Earlier I said, “I’m talking about the kind of gratitude that fills your whole being, that warms your entire being – that warms you down to your very soul.” Notice that it says it fills my whole being. It is possible to see that events that I have shared as emotional wounds that left me less than whole. I have seen them as such but I also see them as what have made me the man I am – the loving man that I am today. I am not a wounded man – I am a whole man that is filled with gratitude for these events that have formed my life. I accept the perfection of my life.

That paragraph sums up how you can be at peace and harmony for the pain in your life.

I welcome you comments. Just click on the word comments below the posting.

What a Difference a Day Makes

What a difference a day makes. On Saturday it was in the sixties. As I sat and wrote at my table yesterday, it was snowing. Big beautiful white flakes. They immediately melted. Later in the day it sleeted for awhile. While driving home from the store big wet snow/rain was hitting the windshield. This morning I wake up to see frost and a light dusting of snow upon the pasture. There's snow on the mountain peak. Suppose to be back in the upper sixties by Friday.

Just Beautiful

The folks I live with are pretty nice people. Had a nice talk with my landlord today as we stood outside enjoying the sun. I really like this piece of property. It's just a beautiful day here today. In the low 60's, sunny, blue skies. I have heard a lot of comments about the pics I post so am posting several more today. The new fence is up and the animals have moved into the new pasture. The burros are Noah and Murphy and horses are Rica and Waku. They seem to be enjoying the fresh grass. Grass is still green here and I saw someone mowing yesterday. I stepped out beyond my mailbox to take the picture of the road I live on. One of the roads I take to get here is I Table Rock Road. The last picture is of the road's namesake.

Finally got my DSL connection yesterday and so won't have to make a trip to Gold Hill Library for Wifi. And I got my new camera connected to the computer. (I fell awhile back and broke the LCD viewer on the old one. )

I have been goofing off today. I have 20 pages to edit and am just putting it off. Why? Because I can! I'm retired -- I don't HAVE to do anything. lol. Have worked on those pages last few days. Will get them edited tomorrow and get back to writing. Tomorrow, I'll do that.

Writing Progress

As I moved to Oregon to write, I did have a very clear idea of how this book would be written. It would include around 40% of newly received dialogue from God. It would include around 40% from past writings. The remaining amount would be quotes from appropriate resources, including the Conversations With God trilogy.

If you are one of those rare viewers of this blog from long ago, you will remember when I wrote my personal life story and shared excerpts from it on this blog. You might find it of interest that parts of that book are being incorporated into this present book. This is both good and bad.

It is good because it means that I seem to be making very rapid progress on this book with only a moderate amount of effort. (So far.)

It is bad because you may remember that writing the book that this blog is titled after was often very emotional for me. Such is the case with what I am working on today and will be for the next couple of days.

Meanwhile, I did finally receive my airbed and am sleeping much more comfortably. My DSL line was turned on today and I should receive the modem anytime between now and Friday. Not that visiting here at the library is that much of a hardship. The Wifi is on even when the library isn't open, but it will be nice to have my own connection.

The Rogue River

I have had several comment that they like the pics so that's the reason for so many posts today. As I said yesterday was a warm day and while I was out and about, I took a drive into the little town of Gold Hill. Along the way I stopped at the Gold Nugget wayside. These shots are of the Rogue River. People stop at this wayside, make their way down to the river and pan for gold. There were several doing so further down river from where these were taken.

Now as you have seen that I have made several posts about my wanderings yesterday, some of you might be wondering if I have begun to write or if I am just goofing off. The answer is yes, I have begun. Yesterday morning and today. I get up early and write for a couple of hours. I ask that you respect my writing process. That means you don't ask if I'm writing, what I'm writing or how's it going. I will share as I can and additional questions just put undue pressure on me. I appreciate your continued support. Feel free to make comments on any of the posts. I encourage you do so. It lets me know there are people out there checking out my blog. Feel free to ask questions about how I am doing or about where I'm living - just respect my writing process. The journey continues.

Take A Hike!

Yesterday was beautiful day. Weather in the sixties and along towards evening the sun came out. I decided to take a walk. Now around here that means a hike as it's nearly impossible to not be walking uphill somewhere along the walk. Now I could climb uphill at the start of the walk or at the end. Being the fat man that I am, I chose at the start. I took these pics as I walked and they give you a better idea of where I'm living at.

Barn Mates

Here are few pics of my barn mates. No more smart ass comments please. I know they have names - I was told them when I was introduced. Damned if I can remember at the moment. I'll get them and a few more pics for another post.

First time

Today is my one month retirement anniversary. Am still not use to the idea of thinking of myself as a retiree. Interesting enough, I thought of work for the first time last night. Well, not really work, but the guys at work. I was making chicken noodle soup. And damn, it was a good batch. I just knew the guys at work would have loved it. And that is the entire extent to which I have thought of work for the month.